Give up the idea of being perfect!
Unconditionaly and fully accept yourself and others.
Don’t expect too much from others.
They are not perfect either.
Do what you do mainly for the enjoyment of it.
Don’t whine!
Regognize that there are almost always alternate solutions to my problem.
Lidia will not talk to me, sleep with me or be around me anymore. It’s sad, but not the end of my world. I can live without her and still be fairly happy.
Take things seriously but none of them too seriously.
I’m on vacation J always have been!
Recognize that you were born and raised with very strong tendencies to be self-defeating but also self-realising.
I have goals, I put my efforts into achieving them, enjoying the process.
If I succeed, good, if I do not, I will do something else and enjoy it just as well.
Risk discomfort until you become comfortable.
Go talk in public
Be assertive
Don’t hang yourself on distractions either cognitive, emotional or physical.
Tv, meditation, reading, swimming, eating chocolate, masturbating… will not help with a specific problem.
What shall I do instead?
Ø Track down my whining, self-defeating thoughts and emotions and defeat them with irony, logic, practical arguments.
What do I do to upset myself?
Blame me.
Ø do not blame myself, do not blame others. We do things, some good, some bad. I tend to do the best I can, if I fail, I will make an effort to do better the next time.
Feel miserable, an unworthy worm, doing bad things to others
Ø even if I do bad things it doesn’t make me a bad person, even if I do good things it doesn t make me a good person. I’m human. I do good and bad things…
Incapable of enjoying myself and my life
Ø find pleasure in what I do. Little things, minute by minute.
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